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After succumbing to a fever of some sort in 1705, Irish woman Margorie McCall was hastily buried to prevent the spread of whatever had done her in. Margorie was buried with a valuable ring, which her husband had been unable to remove due to swelling. This made her an even better target for body snatchers, who could cash in on both the corpse and the ring.

The evening after Margorie was buried, before the soil had even settled, the grave-robbers showed up and started digging. Unable to pry the ring off the finger, they decided to cut the finger off. As soon as blood was drawn, Margorie awoke from her coma, sat straight up and screamed.

The fate of the grave-robbers remains unknown. One story says the men dropped dead on the spot, while another claims they fled and never returned to their chosen profession.

Margorie climbed out of the hole and made her way back to her home.

Her husband John, a doctor, was at home with the children when he heard a knock at the door. He told the children, “If your mother were still alive, I’d swear that was her knock.”

When he opened the door to find his wife standing there, dressed in her burial clothes, blood dripping from her finger but very much alive, he dropped dead to the floor. He was buried in the plot Margorie had vacated.

Margorie went on to re-marry and have several children. When she did finally die, she was returned to Shankill Cemetery in Lurgan, Ireland, where her gravestone still stands. It bears the inscription “Lived Once, Buried Twice.”

what did i just read

Irish women are strong as fuck

I’m Irish and I can conclude that we are motherfucking metal

the-goddamazon:

anothercoverup:

manekikoneko:

cloppinq:

water is fucked up because you need it to live and then it drowns you just because it can

Oxygen’s even more fucked up because you need it to process your most basic functions and from the very first breath you take, it is already working on oxidizing literally every part of you. We spend our whole lives being broken down by oxygen, one chemical reaction at a time.

Science side is morbid tonight

Y’all alright over there, science tumblr?

(Source: hamfucker39)

September 15, 2132

According to a recent study conducted by Harvard University, it is now literally impossible for a student to write an essay pertaining to the themes or symbolism in the popular F. Scott Fitzgerald novel The Great Gatsby without it technically being considered plagiarism.

"I’ve had a number of instances where students would ‘accidentally’ plagiarize another piece of work," says Eugene Smith, an English professor. "Sometimes what they write just happens to be almost identical to what someone else wrote. This was less of a problem earlier in the century, but lately… every essay seems identical to one I’ve already read before."

The study claims that, due to the sheer quantity of papers written on The Great Gatsby, there are “virtually no formations of words pertaining to symbolism and/or theme in The Great Gatsby that have not already been written at least once. Henceforth, any organization of words about the aforementioned novel will, inevitably, bare enough resemblance to at least one, but probably many more, previous writings on the subject, and would therefore technically be considered plagiarism. It’s now linguistically impossible to say anything about The Great Gatsby that has not already been said multiple times, almost verbatim, no matter what.”

One English teacher, who wished to remain anonymous, said that he gave up entering students’ essays into plagiarism detecting programs, as they always showed up multiple results, dating back for decades, even when no conscious plagiarism was performed.

Teachers are currently debating whether to finally remove The Great Gatsby from the curriculum, as there is now “literally nothing left to say about it.”

Symbolism, Theme Essays on The Great Gatsby Literally Impossible To Not Plagiarize, Says Recent Study

The Wishwashington Post 

(via thewishwashingtonpost)

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